Bio-nic Vision

A gaming magazine I’ve written for is making a comeback, and as part of the revival they’ve asked all of the writers to submit a one-paragraph biography that “encapsulates you, your attitude, and your writing talent.” It’s supposed to be snarky and aimed at the 12-35-year-old gamer. I thought some of you might be amused to read the one I submitted, so:

[The Gryphon Rose] has been writing forever. At least, that’s what his wife claims when she wants him to step away from the keyboard. Certainly he spends more time writing than he does eating, drinking, or sleeping—breathing is debatable. Eleven years ago [the Gryphon Rose] graduated from gamer to game writer because he was itching to inflict his stories and worlds upon the unsuspecting masses. He now has over fifty gaming books under his belt, which is the only thing holding his pants up since he often forgets to eat. [The Gryphon Rose] also writes educational books, because being a game writer isn’t time-consuming enough, and he writes Star Trek books and fantasy novels when he wants to take a break. He lives in New York with his wife, his one-year-old daughter, and his cat, unless they’ve moved out while he was chained to his desk again.